Baby no. 2

Women of my generation will understand what an incredible reversal in mode of thinking it is to feel happy when you don't get your period and sad if you do.

For the majority of our early sexual experiences, we take great pains to ensure we don't get pregnant. Pills before and after, condoms, spermicides...the works.

Then, one day, the opposite. A total shift in ideology and lifestyle. And we beckon it, welcome it, say thank you when we get a plus instead of a minus.

The one time we are happy to add rather than subtract. 

I have been waiting for that plus sign. Waiting for the second soul to take up residence in my body. And she (or he) is here. I am pregnant. Je suis enceinte. 

Our baby is due in January, 2014. I'm nervous about pregnancy, terrified by delivery and the pain I know I will endure, and worried about my time postpartum. 

But, mostly, I am grateful. I will endure whatever is to come, and it will all be worth it. A new life will join the human race. Maya will have a sibling. James and I will have another human bond. I will hold a tiny precious life inside and outside of me. I will help shape her destiny. She will be a beautiful person for however long she is allowed to be part of our world. 

We will be human together. 

We will be a family.